That’s real love.

Fall in love with your best friend. Someone you can talk to about anything and know they’ll hold no judgement. Someone who knows the darkest parts of you and loves you anyway, that knows all your flaws and loves you not in spite of them but because of them. Not someone that you can’t live without, but someone that you don’t want to live without. Someone that you want to experience all of life’s ups and downs with. Someone who will hold your hand through the worst times of your life. When they see you at your worst, when you’re broken, and they don’t run away but help you put the pieces back together, that’s real love.

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  1. Someone recently asked me if it’s better to have loved and lost or to have never loved at all. I will happily share my story.

    I met by best friend and soulmate quite by accident. I was not looking nor was I expecting anything following a devastating divorce. I was content, free and independent, relieved to be able to start over. By chance, I decided to go out one evening just to socialize and ran into an old friend. With him was his wife and her best friend from college. Becky was a quick-witted smart aleck and we traded jabs that night. A week passed and we both reached out to one another the same evening. We joined our friends at a drive-in movie (yes, a real drive-in) in Fort Collins Colorado. We were there for four hours and never saw the either movie. We talked, and talked and laughed. At the end of the evening, I drove her home and hugged her at the door.
    Several days elapsed and we both played phone tag with one another. I was traveling all over the West Coast, she in Colorado. We kept trying and connected finally at the end of the week. We got together at a 4 year old’s birthday party. Then again later that evening for dinner. We had a couple of more dinner dates and suddenly were talking about dating and the future as though we had been together for a long time.
    We were able to talk about anything and everything together from the moment we met. No secrets, no holding back, no fear of disclosing anything and everything good or bad. We laughed, we shared, we cried too. We knew. We had THAT connection. I asked her to move in with me.
    Within months we were discussing marriage and building a family together. We designed her wedding ring together, a one-of-a-kind. I insisted on talking to her parents. We planned a Christmas visit to her home in WV. I called both parents individually to ask permission to accompany her home at Christmas.
    I has the privilege of asking for her hand from both parents. They both blessed our plans, I proposed and we were married in May the following year.
    We had two great kids together, both extremely intelligent and charming young men. We enjoyed eight years together before she was suddenly taken from us.

    I was devastated. I was unprepared for how unprepared I was to be without her by my side. For several years I was angry and depressed. It has taken time to mourn her loss. She was truly unique. Not perfect and neither was I but she was my best friend and soulmate.

    And now, back to the original question. Is it better to have loved and lost or to have never experienced it. It is better to have loved and lost without a doubt. I have two very special young men as reminders.

    Rest in peace Becky. Thank you for loving me.

    1. Dear Mark, I am very sorry for your loss. I read your story and I want to thank you for sharing it with us. We are blessed to have had the privilege of having a rare insight of your thoughts and life. Becky sounds like a wonderful wife, mother and friend. God Bless you all.

  2. That was absolutely beautifu….yes experiencing love is better than not living it,even if it hurts in the end.

  3. Mark,
    Such a sweet story. I agree. Having loved and then lost my one true love after 51 years I truly understand.
    As he was dying with cancer he said to me “Patty, I want you to be happy. So whatever opportunity comes along, if it makes you happy, take it.” He said this with tears in his eyes. I can still see him like that. He was a gem, a true gentleman and loved and adored me as I did/do him. Apparently you are young, so grab the opportunity to love again if it comes your way. You will never forget nor stop loving Becky but you can love again.

  4. I just ran into your love story with Becky . I know it’s a year later that I am posting this but love stories have no endings or beginnings they are here and now even if they are a day long or 50 years short . She sounds amazing and you were smiling all the time I can tell.
    I’m happy that you experienced a love such as this . We are blessed with a chance of being with our soul mate once in a lifetime ,twice if lucky , three times if blessed by God .
    By now you may have found that beautiful second soul mate who spins your heart and drives you crazy with undying love and laughter .
    Anyways , I tried to make this short and sweet but it’s always a story it seems 🙂
    Thank you so much for sharing your heart and love with the world Mark 🙂 ♡♡

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