
People talk about depression like it’s something weak. But coming out of it and through it to the other side alive, is the strongest and bravest thing you will ever do.
People talk about depression like it’s something weak. But coming out of it and through it to the other side alive, is the strongest and bravest thing you will ever do.
I lost my daughter of 36 years old a year ago in April. I am on depression meds and anxiety meds, but it just seems like I am sinking into a black hole further every day. I don’t care if I live but, would never kill myself. I have a son and beautiful grandaughter I want to be here for but seems like a loosing battle everydaY.
I’m a 46 yrs. old. female.
I remember feelings of a strong
sadness around puberty. Kept to
myself, no one else seemed sad.
Prior to that time in my life I
was happy, smiling, full of life & dreams. Pictures I have viewed prior to the sadness,
was the most beautiful girl!
Olive skin,smiling/laughing w/
long brown hair, full of energy and never stopped moving…I was unstoppable.Musically talented. Raised in the church.
Confident.
By the age of 15 I knew I had
changed. I cried when no one
was around. I was numb & scared. Still no one I could open up to.
I’m 46 now, diagnosed with
clinical depression in 1995.
I knew I was. Nothing seems to
help. Sure, I’ve tried to take my life multiple times…almost
succeed twice. Not proud. Just
tired.
My family live out of state and my mom has been the only one
who has spoken to me in 5 yrs.
It’s a 4 hr. drive to come see me. I’ve asked her to come, but
she states that she is “teaching me a lesson.”
Yes, I realize I’m 46 & should
not need my 74 yr. old mother, (who is in excellent health.)
to support me. She’ll yell and
put me down… it’s familiar.
I have tried resources where I live.
I do not want to harm myself
again, nor have I ever wanted
to harm another. I want to live!
I’ve never been married. I have
isolated from the few friends I have due to my depression.
I really want to feel better.
Please…I do not want to
come across as a “victim.”
I won’t give up!
I just need what is the next
step out of this deep, dark
hole?
I’m sorry…but, depression is
not EASY to overcome alone.
Suggestions are welcome-
Thank-you~ Es
Dear Esmae, Thank you for reaching out. I have read your message and I am so sorry your have dealt with depression for so many years. I write this to you with deep sincerity, please see your family doctor so that you can get professional help, see a therapist or talk to someone who you can trust. In the mean time here is a terrific website that has wonderful suggestions on how to deal and cope with depression. I hope this helps. God Bless.
http://www.helpguide.org/articles/depression/dealing-with-depression.htm
Esmae, I understand what your going through. I’ve been diagnosed bipolar type 1. I have no friends who call, because I have also isolated myself. I don’t trust myself in public. I’m on medications but I think it’s time for a change. No it’s not easy to overcome. One thing I trick myself with is, I wake up glad I’m still here. I do have a family but only one really understands. Most my family lets me be. It’s like being forgotten. It’s time to let people go in your life that don’t support you. That’s what I’m coming to grips with. So I’m going to make that long awaited appointment with a doctor. I hope you do the same. Peace be with you.
Hi Patricia, I totally understand how you must feel. When people don’t understand how you feel and what you are going through, you feel very alone, even when you are surrounded by people, even the ones who love you. If you are seeing a doctor, or therapist, may I suggest that you bring along a member of your family to one of your sessions or appointment so that you can discuss your feelings and the doctor/therapist can help you. They can answer all the questions like how they (your family) can help you when you are feeling a certain way or any questions that are presently on your mind. Another thing you can do is go to or call the Mental Health America/Canadian Mental Health, Not sure where you are from. or again ask your doctor,for pamphlets on Bipolar and hopefully get your family to read about it. Or get books at the library or book store. Education is the best way for everyone to understand each other. I wish you all the best and try to deliver to your knowledge with kindness. I find that people listen better that way. ((hugs)) Brigitte
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