It’s Not That I Don’t Care, You’re Just Not Worth The Fight.
I’ve tried so hard for so long to make sense of everything. It’s been a long, difficult road to even get my head halfway clear enough to make a mature and responsible decision about what I want from us. But now that I’m finally seeing things properly, I want to lay everything out for you in order to explain. I know that you don’t understand, that you think that somewhere along the line I just stopped caring about you, but that just isn’t the truth.
You need to realize that there was a big part of me that wanted to keep on going like we have been. I could have gone in circles forever.
But that isn’t what’s right. It isn’t what’s right for me, and it’s not what is right for you, either. I’ve spent so long trying to make things work that it’s hard to finally accept that it wasn’t meant to be, but I know now that I have to.
There was a time when I thought things would all work out eventually. I thought that we’d smooth out all of the kinks, that the lying and the mistakes and the heartache would one day come to an end. But over time, I’ve woken up and smelt the coffee. The weeks turned into months, the months turned to years, and nothing changed.
I realized that the relationship we would have in the future would be the exact same as the one we had then. I looked deep into my heart and asked myself if I could do this forever, and the reply was both heart-breaking and strangely relieving.
I realized that if I wanted to be happy, if I wanted both of us to be happy, then I had to let you go. It’s nothing personal. I still care about you. In fact, it’s because I care about you that I’m telling you this at all. We just weren’t meant to be, no matter how much we wanted that to be the case.
I don’t regret the time we spent together. You taught me priceless lessons about love, about life, about the process of being human. You will always have a place in my heart. I just can’t do this anymore.
I can’t carry on like this. I know nothing will change if we keep doing everything exactly the same, going around in these circles where we hurt each other and cry because all we want is to be happy together. I’ve realized that perhaps that just isn’t possible for us.
So, it’s time for me to say goodbye. I know I wasn’t perfect, and I know you weren’t either. We both did our best, but our best wasn’t good enough, and that’s okay. It’s not something that we can control. All we can do is learn from our mistakes and go forward as better people.
I’m sorry that we didn’t work out. I’m sorry that we just weren’t right for each other. We both gave it our best shot, but it was never going to work. Now we have to part ways. Our roads go on, but they go on in different directions. Thank you for everything, and please try your best to understand. I get it if you hate me, if you never want to speak to me again, but I’m only trying to do what’s best. I hope that one day you understand.
Goodbye, and try to remember the good times we shared. I know I always will.
Written by Maverick, Staff writer at Lessons Learned In Life Inc. ©