To encourage you to keep going.
To remind you to be strong.

Published on July 9, 2017 in Picture Quotes
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I thought it would be painful, letting you go.

I thought I would suffer, that my heart would be anguished with the loss of you. Or worse, maybe it would stop beating altogether.

Maybe without you, I would simply cease to exist.

I thought I would become adrift, for you had been the anchor I had formed my identity upon, the compass I had relied on for my direction. I thought without you I would become lost, disoriented.

I had expected to taste salty tears as they fell upon lips that once spoke so fondly of you; that my head would lay on my pillow damp with tears for as many nights as the moon continued to kiss the stars.

But one day, I just knew.

I hadn’t expected such a feeling of relief as I cut the ropes that once shackled me to you. One instant of tremendous clarity. One instant, where I finally knew.

I no longer needed you.

I no longer needed your opinion of me, your affirmation, your approval.

I no longer needed your judgments, your criticisms, your condemnations.

I no longer needed your expectations I could never meet; your hoops too high to jump through, your goal posts that shifted with every changing breeze.

I no longer needed your blame, your excuses, your justifications.

I no longer needed your pseudo love, fraught with conditions and attached with strings.

I thought I needed you. I didn’t.

I thought it would be hard to let you go. It wasn’t.

I thought I would miss you. I don’t.

For in one instant my heart was awakened to the truth of who I am.

I am more than the lies you made believe about myself. I am more than the look of failure in your eyes when I fell short of your demands. I am more than how worthless you made me feel. I am more than the ways you tried to break me.

I am a warrior, sculpted by the hands of creation, fashioned into being by the very hands that created the oceans and the stars and the mountains and air.

I am strong, I am brave, I am wise. I am gentle of spirit with the heart of a lioness.

I am creative, passionate, sensitive, and kind. I am of open heart and open mind. I am powerful, generous, thoughtful, daring, empathetic, raw, complex, courageous, understanding, forgiving.

I am everything you are not.

I will no longer carry the shame you made me suffer under the weight of.

That shame belongs to you.

And I will no longer carry my hate for you.

For that will only ever bind me to your darkness and give you permission to destroy my light. It will allow you to stay within me, to destroy my peace, to blacken my heart with the malice that lives within you.

It will tie me to your soul-destroying bitterness, your ugliness.

It will anchor me once more to you, who tried to drown me.

Instead, I will choose to go into the world and love more fiercely, show more compassion, be more generous, offer more kindness.

I will choose to forgive. For me, not for you.

I will choose to sow what I wish to see reaped for my children’s future.

I will choose to dis-empower hate.

I will choose freedom.

I will choose love.

I will stand firm upon the unshakeable truth of who I am.

And I will soar to heights you will only ever dream of.

For I have let you go.

No longer am I held down by all I allowed you to be in my life.

I no longer need you.

I am free.

Written by Kathy Parker

( with permission)

Find out more about Kathy at her blog: https://kathyparker.com.au/

11 Comments

  1. Alla July 9, 2017 Reply

    How beautiful, how great and how heart touching. Only a person who was there can relate.thank you for very sentence for every word.

  2. ARLENE G. BANUELOS July 9, 2017 Reply

    Life has to go on….the most important thing is that there was that seasonal yet wholesome friendly encounter….the truth was I knew a part of who you are and likewise… Thanks to the regard of trust (though not absolute), respect and honesty in our communication…..

  3. ARLENE G. BANUELOS July 9, 2017 Reply

    the nicest dream ever….the memories will be cherished forever and always….

  4. Logan July 9, 2017 Reply

    Mind blowing lines! Made me feel great. Thank you 🙂
    #breakup #overcoming #pain

  5. noonespecial July 9, 2017 Reply

    ohhhh! What desperate, sad poetry. Sorry, but I do not like that at all. The past can not be changed. The future can only be conditionally influenced. The present counts. If your love true? Are the feelings real? If so, there is a way. If not, the present is a bad game.
    I really love when I say it. And I do not care about the past. I am concerned about shaping the present so that there can be a nice future. I can do it, because I think positively. Because I forgive. Because I care. And because I love.
    Whoever has written this poetry: Go to the bright side of life and do not always run in the shade!

    • Sanhitha July 9, 2017 Reply

      If someone did really care about me he would not leave me guessing who could be chatting with me on the other side.
      Men, If you do not have the courage to talk to her in person, in real atleast give her the comfort that it is you when asked for.
      Because you never know why and what she feels into otherwise. The feeling that she is talking and giving all wrong impressions to someone else on the pretext it is you, may be killing her inside though for you it could be just alright.

      And I wonder how could a man who truly claims to love her can leave his better half this bad state, confused and guessing ?
      Is it harm to give her some peace in this atleast ? when there is much and many more around…… ?????

  6. Kelsey July 9, 2017 Reply

    Love this poem. It perfectly captures what someone goes through after an abusive relationship. That moment when they can finally see past the illusion and lies. And then taking back their life! 😁💞

  7. Flying Free July 9, 2017 Reply

    Noonespecial, I disagree. Perhaps it comes from one’s perspective. I read this and saw a woman who has become free and empowered. I identified with every word, because it could have been written about my journey separating from my mother. I finally feel free.

  8. Shawna July 9, 2017 Reply

    Thank you Kathy. Your put so much emotions in your words. They explain exactly how most of us feel. Love you dear friend. ❤

  9. Tammy Campbell July 10, 2017 Reply

    Thank you very much to share this one. I think you jump right into our hearts out here. For I am one with a broken heart too. Those words was all the right reasons that I couldn’t call them all, there were so many. Great job!

  10. Gregg February 26, 2018 Reply

    I am maybe ‘that brother’ that you be leaving in disdain.
    I have given you my loyalty, my heart, and made you my anchor in life.
    And you have grown cold and angry.
    You lost the thrill of an exciting hot Tantric relationship.
    You got all my attention, you tied my heart up in knots,
    told me you didn’t feel anything anymore, down there , in your heart
    What could I do but fall on my knees and beg you how much you mean to me.
    How could you go so fucking far with us,
    and leave me with knife wounds bleeding ?
    I finally totally surrendered to you happily, woman of all my dreams .
    And you have left my side constantly unhappy, spiteful, jealous of mother sisters who have seen what you are doing, and want to reach out to me to dry my tears.
    How could you?
    Why would you care if other sisters want to be close to me when you have spit in my face making me feel so worthless and meaningless.
    I’ve heard so many bogus excuses for your loss of emotions and feelings .
    You want me to lie in our bed next to you night after night and smell you .
    And watch your lips on mine ,
    I need the sweet taste of woman I HAVE EVER KNOWN,
    Can you tell me sorry just stay to myself. Contain myself maybe someday you’ll find your feelings for me again but right now you’re just made another one of your counselors plane tickets to travel away for me for months at a time waiting hoping praying wondering reading crying .
    You are so self confident and sure of yourself and so lacking in empathy for anyone else that loves you .
    I’ve been studying about narcissism and find out many things I never knew before
    I don’t think I can go on living this way

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