To encourage you to keep going.
To remind you to be strong.

Published on January 10, 2018 in Picture Quotes

When I chose to let you go, there was no great moment of triumph.
There wasn’t an earth-shattering epiphany that changed my life, where music played and the universe conspired to bring everything together for good.

There was no conflict, no turmoil and no struggle. No internal argument. No weighing of pros and cons. No decision to be analyzed to death—even by me, who cannot make a decision without weeks of obsessive thought over every possible outcome.

There were only two words, when I chose to let you go:

No more.

No more will I measure my worth against your opinion. No more will I be pressed into the shapes you carved for me. No more will I tell my heart to quiet down, ashamed of its clatter. No more will there be blood on my feet from the eggshells I walked on as I tried not to give cause for your disapproval.

No more will I anguish over the ways you misunderstood me. No more will I fight to justify the intention of my heart. No more will I beg for you to see me, the real me—to know me, to love me.

No more will I live my life for you.

When I chose to let you go, there was no holy encounter. The stars did not collapse from the sky and cascade into the oceans. There was no ferocious wind that rattled the walls or blazing fire that consumed all within its destructive path.

There was only quiet resolution, the silent death of leaves that drift to the ground as frost begins to waste them away.
And there I found myself, in the barren ground where you once stood; I came to understand there must be winter.

Winter in all its loss, its grief, its letting go.
There must be a time for old things to die, that new things may be born.

When I chose to let you go, it was for me.

I learned to love myself even when you made me feel I deserved no love. To honor my own needs, my own heart and my own potential. To walk my own path, not yours. To not be pulled back into your confines while my spirit yearned to be free.

When I chose to let you go, I made coffee, ate toast, and folded clothes. I went to yoga and collected my mail and paid my bills. There was nothing out of place on the outside of my ordinary life—no visible change, nothing new or different.

There was only surrender.

One moment.

One breath.

I chose to let you go.

And in doing so, I chose me.

By Kathy Parker
(with permission)

Please check out Kathy’s blog at :


  1. Gerry clark January 11, 2018 Reply

    I wish my daughter had read this. She was in a terrible relationship and died at age 44. She loved this man so much and did not want to go on without him. I had told her about this web sight but do not know if she ever read it. I wish she had!

  2. ARLENEGB January 12, 2018 Reply

    We both choose to let each other go….may not be good…but the best of all bests decision….

  3. Arnold January 13, 2018 Reply

    I really needed this today! Thank you to whoever

  4. Sylvia January 16, 2018 Reply

    What a beautiful reminder, a note to ourselves…we have to move on, to let go, because we deserve better. For me a perfekt timing to read this…Thank you

  5. Daisy Gonzalez January 25, 2018 Reply

    Self love to it’s potential, loved it! Sadly we neglect our selves, trying to please someone that can never be pleased. Thank you Jesus for the power you give us to let go!

  6. KathyNotNayNay January 26, 2018 Reply

    So happy to let go and move on. We know when we deserve better. It might have taken time to realize we deserve better. But I know now. He is not worthy of me!

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