It’s all too easy when you’re deep into a relationship to take your partner for granted. The deterioration happens so gradually, over such a long period of time, that it’s hard to notice the relationship is in decline at any given point. Perhaps you’re short on money so you pause your Friday night dates and never get back into the habit. Maybe you start working longer hours and find that you no longer give your spouse a kiss goodbye before you leave for work in the morning.
Too many people make the mistake of thinking that their love goes without saying, that they don’t need to display how much their partner means to them because they must ‘already know’. People need validation. Men, women – it doesn’t matter. We as humans need to feel wanted, appreciated, loved, and desired by our partners. Without this feeling of security, it seems as though something is missing. The relationship feels wrong. People who feel insecure in their relationship can only last so long before they break and decide that they want out.
It’s often said that if you want your relationship to last a lifetime, then you have to treat every day like it’s the first you’ve ever spent with them. Do that, and there won’t be a last day. It’s easier said than done, however. Relationships are hard work. They’re never easy and they’re never perfect. They’re two different individuals coming together to work on a project bigger than themselves. It requires lots of hard work and sacrifice – and that includes each person spending time and energy showing the other that they still appreciate them; that they don’t take their love for granted.
This doesn’t mean, however, that you need to make a big show of how much you love your partner. Most people don’t need expensive bouquets of flowers delivered or vacations to Paris (although those always help!). Handwritten notes saying you love them, making an effort to cook or clean for them, or meaningful hugs and passionate kissing all go a long way towards making your significant other feel wanted and appreciated.
There’s a reason that half of all marriages end in divorce. Love is a commitment. It’s a journey and a process, rather than a state of being. If you take your partner’s love for granted and assume they’ll be there regardless of whether or not you expend any effort showing them how much you mean to them, it’s all too possible that one day you’ll wake up and find that they’ve checked out of the relationship mentally. They don’t have to physically leave you for it to be too late to for you to make amends. Once that switch in their head flips, once they fall out of love, it’s very hard to ever find a way back. Appreciate the love you have – and show the special person in your life that you do. Never take it for granted.
Written by Maverick, Staff Writer at Lessons Learned In Life Inc.