To encourage you to keep going.
To remind you to be strong.

Archive for August, 2019

  • August 31, 2019
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    Ten Reasons Why Cousins Make The Greatest Best Friends

     

    Almost everybody has some kind of cousin in their life, whether they’re a first cousin or a slightly more distant relation. We all know how it feels to have family around the same age as us who we’ve grown up alongside and share a bond with unlike anyone else. Here are ten reasons why cousins make great best friends.

     

    1. They make family holidays and gatherings bearable: let’s be honest, without our cousins, family meetings would be torture. Between drunk relatives, annoying personalities, and the same old arguments, we need our cousins there to keep us sane and grounded. We need the people there who we can get away from the chaos and laugh about all of it with.

     

    1. You’re not just bound by friendship, you’re related by blood: you may be great friends with your cousins, but you’ll always be more than that. You’re family, and family sticks together. It doesn’t matter what happens, because you know that you’ll always be there for each other in the end.

     

    1. They know your family as well as you do: you don’t have to worry about your dad being embarrassing or your grandma having one too many glasses of wine when you’re with your cousins. They know your family just as well as you do, so nothing phases them.

     

    1. You experience family losses alongside them: there’s no worse experience in life than the people you love passing away. When you lose family, your cousins are right there with you, feeling that same pain and heartbreak and helping you through it just like you’re helping them.

     

    1. You don’t have to pretend to be someone you aren’t around them: you can be totally at ease around your family; there’s nothing to hide. You can be as weird and as annoying as you want around your cousins, and they’ll return the favor by being themselves too.

     

    1. No matter what happens, you’ll always be family: everybody has fights and disagreements from time to time, and friends are no exception to this. With cousins, though you’re more than just friends. You’re family. That means you stick together, no matter what. An argument last week is forgotten this week, and you’re back to being best friends again. There’s no hard feelings, because deep down you both know it’s all love.

     

    1. They were your first best friends: your cousins were the friends you had before you even knew what friends were. They were there in the beginning, and they’ll be there in the end.

     

    1. Sleepovers: there was nothing more awesome as a kid than spending whole days hanging out with your cousins, then asking your parents if they could sleepover. You could stay up late talking and laughing and having fun, and then wake up and have breakfast together. 

     

    1. You’re more than friends, but less than siblings: your cousins are closer to you than friends, but they’re not as intimately involved in the details of your life as your siblings. They represent that perfect middle ground where they know you very well and get along with you brilliantly, but you don’t have to see them every day.

     

    1. You can share family gossip with each other: there’s no one you can gossip with quite like your cousins. All of the family drama, the ins and outs of the relationships of aunts and uncles… being part of a group of cousins is almost like being part of a secret club that no one else has access to.

     

    We love them, we hate them, then we love them again. Cousins are the greatest, there’s no doubt about it. You know they’ll always come to events just to have fun and eat some food, because that’s what cousins do. That’s why they make the greatest best friends!

    Written by Maverick, Staff writer at Lessons Learned In Life Inc. ©
  • August 27, 2019
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    Everything will work out in the end. You don’t need to know how. You just have to trust that it will.

  • August 22, 2019
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    Sometimes life doesn’t give you what you want, not because you don’t deserve it, but because you deserve so much more.

  • August 19, 2019
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    People will throw stones at you. Don’t throw them back. Collect them all and build an Empire.

  • August 18, 2019
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    A True Father Is One Who Understands That Family Comes First

     

    Becoming the father of a child is a relatively simple process. If it wasn’t, we wouldn’t be here in the first place. You don’t need much more than sex and luck in order to get a woman pregnant and end up as a parent. 

    But being a dad – now, that takes something else.

    Being a dad is about far more than just fathering a child. It’s about who you are as a person. It’s about the way you view yourself, others, and the world, and the way those views are reflected in how your treat your children.

    Being a dad is about being there for your family – and not just with your wallet when something needs paying for. It’s about being able to comfort your son or daughter when they’re crying. It’s about being able to be gentle, to be kind, compassionate, and understanding. It’s about knowing that nothing good is achieved through raising your voice and throwing your weight around. 

    Being a dad means spending time with your kids. It means not being afraid to embrace your silly side in order to have fun with your children.

    Being a dad is about taking care of your family’s emotional needs as well as their physical ones. It’s about sticking by your children through thick and thin, not abandoning them as soon as times get tough. A dad is someone who goes to any length to make sure their kids are healthy, happy, and safe, not someone who just does the bare minimum and then holds their hands up in defeat.

    A dad is someone who treats others with respect and patience, regardless of who they are, what they look like, or what choices they make about what they do with their lives.

    A dad is a man that can hold his hands up and admit when he’s wrong. Someone who can accept their own flaws, and knows that they can’t judge anyone else too harshly for the same reason. A dad is a person that knows the limits of their own understanding, and keeps an open mind about all things.

    A dad is someone who understands that they are a role model for their kids. It’s someone who knows that their behavior directly influences the way their children think, feel, and act.

    A true dad is someone who knows they have to make sacrifices for their family, and does so without hesitation. Someone who puts their children first, above anyone else; someone who understands that they are responsible for the future wellbeing of their children and cares about their future.

    Being a dad means knowing how to have fun. It means knowing when to break the rules, when to let your hair down for the sake of enjoying the present moment. It means getting to know your children as the miniature people that they really are. It means knowing their likes and dislikes, their hopes and dreams, their hobbies, their friends and their enemies. 

    But most of all, being a dad means learning as much from your children as they learn from you, and becoming a better person every day.

    Written by Maverick, Staff writer at Lessons Learned In Life Inc. ©
  • August 17, 2019
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    Read This When Your Heart Is Heavy And Your Soul Is Tired

     

    Nobody ever says when we’re growing up that life will be easy, but few people ever tell us just how hard it can get. Of course, why would they? Who can look a child in the eyes and tell them that they will know pain and loss and heartache beyond anything they could ever imagine now? 

    But to feel pain and to experience difficulty is part of the human condition. It’s as much a part of life as feeling love, joy, and wonder. 

    The truth of the matter is that being alive in a human body is a non-stop rollercoaster of duality. We, as human beings, are capable of feeling the most unbelievable highs of beauty and brilliance and the most soul-crushingly awful lows. We go through life not knowing what to expect next, and worse, carrying the weight of the burden of knowing that deep within ourselves is the capability to be as awful and nasty as the worst among us are. 

    It’s important to realize that loving yourself is about loving yourself completely, even those parts of yourself that you might not like.

    You have to learn how to forgive yourself for being human. You have to realize that those parts about yourself that you feel are negative or imperfect are as much a part of you as your love, your kindness, your laughter, and your compassion.  

    True personal growth isn’t about eliminating your dark side; it’s about coming to accept it. It’s about learning to love it like you would a sister or brother. Every rose needs manure, and every person needs their animal instincts in order to survive. Having these instincts sometimes means that we do things we end up regretting, and that’s okay.

    It’s okay to not be okay. It’s okay to be depressed, to be sad, to be angry, to feel guilty, or remorseful – it’s all just part of being human.

    Life becomes a much more peaceful and enlightening experience when you can feel all of these negative things without feeling ashamed at yourself for feeling that way in the first place; when you understand that you are only human, and that you’re set up to experience pain and sadness and fear from the very start.

    You don’t have to force yourself to be happy. You don’t have to feel any other way than how you feel right here, right now.

    You are an infinite soul. You are the sum total of all possibility. You exist in multiplicities. You will feel pain again, but you will also feel happy. You will feel hope. Despair. Joy. Anger. Ecstasy.

    You’re a balancing act. And that’s okay! You were never meant to be anything else.

    And that’s the truth of the matter; the thing beneath the surface that’s so obvious but that so few of us truly recognize – that there would be no love without loss. There would be no happiness without sadness, no truth without lies, no fullness without emptiness. We exist to feel all of these things, good and bad, and we feel all of these things because without black you cannot have white. You can’t have light without dark, or heads without tails. Polarity is the essence of all things, like yin and yang.

    And this is what no one tells you, what no one talks about. Life is both beautiful and terrible, uplifting and depressing. Being a human is a difficult and messy, but manageable, situation. You have to recognize that we would not be able to appreciate the smooth without the rough; good and bad go hand in hand to give us the depth of experience that we wake up and take for granted each day.

    Being human and being at peace takes effort, determination, compassion, persistence, and a whole multitude of other traits, but most of all it takes courage. It takes bravery to get up every morning and keep going when all you want is for everything to stop. Courage isn’t the absence of fear, but being able to feel it and carry on regardless. 

    You are strong; much stronger than you realize. Nothing lasts forever, not your pain, not your sadness, not your tiredness. This too will pass. And on the other side of it is the rest of your life – bad times, sure. But good ones, too. Love, laughter, learning, green fields, blue skies, and beyond.

    Written by Maverick, Staff writer at Lessons Learned In Life Inc. ©
  • August 16, 2019
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    The Person You Think About Before You Fall Asleep.

     

    You turn off the lights and get under the sheets, letting your head sink into your pillow and your eyes close in the darkness. What comes to mind? Is it a memory, or a place, perhaps? Maybe it’s a person? Someone who often features in your thoughts before you fall asleep, and even makes an appearance in your dreams?

    At some point or other, all of us have this particular experience. We all know what it’s like to feel that way about someone; that painful longing where we wish we knew if they felt the same way. In those last few moments right before we slip into the peaceful oblivion of sleep, that person haunts our thoughts and our imagination. 

    We wonder whether they’ve ever thought about us the way we think of them. We ask ourselves if there’s any chance we’ll ever fall asleep wrapped up in their arms, our minds firmly grounded in the present moment as we soak up their presence and drift off to sleep completely content. 

    Someone who features in your thoughts like this late at night, when there’s nothing else to distract you and your mind is free to rove and scan over the things in your life that you feel the most positive about, must surely mean a lot to you.

    How do you feel about them? Ask yourself, and be honest in your answer. How would you feel if you knew they felt the same way about you?

    Chances are that when you start asking yourself questions of this nature your heart starts beating faster and you feel butterflies in your stomach. There’s no way they feel the same way, right? Even if they do, there’s no way of knowing. You could never put yourself on the line and tell them how you feel. You could never take that gamble, never risk being rejected by the person who you idolize and be left more alone than you’ve ever felt. 

    You are just a dreamer, and they are just a dream. That’s all there is to it, and that’s enough. Better to keep them as a pleasant dream that you can continue to enjoy than wake up to the disappointing reality that you can’t look at the same way ever again, right? If you never take that chance, you never have to find out. You never have to be rejected. You can keep on thinking about them before you go to sleep, safe in the knowledge that you never have to know how it feels to have them turn you down.

    Is it better to strike out or never play in the first place? Do you take a chance, knowing that everything could crash and burn, or do you walk home alone again in the rain? The choice is yours, of course, but I’d urge you to consider the following:

    Life is short, and nothing lasts forever. 

    Sure, you can play it safe. You can hide yourself away, avoid taking risks, and never have to experience how it feels to be rejected by the person who lingers on your mind in your most vulnerable moments. 

    But you’re going to die one day.

    No one ends up on their deathbed in their old age wishing they’d played things more safely. No one lays there, dying, regretting the moments they chose to be brave and to put themselves on the line.

    What would you regret if the end came to you now? Life is an adventure to be embraced, not a problem to be solved. No matter how safely you play things, in the end we’re all going the same way. Playing it safe is an illusion. There is no way to avoid the negative parts of life. But if you never try, never put yourself on the line and take a risk, you’ll never achieve those things you dream about, and you may well end up regretting it in your last moments.

    So, take a chance. Put yourself out there. Who knows? Maybe that person you think about before you fall asleep thinks about you too.

    Written by Maverick, Staff writer at Lessons Learned In Life Inc. ©
  • August 11, 2019
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    Don’t cry over the pastit’s gone. Don’t stress about the future, it hasn’t arrived. Live in the present and make it beautiful.

  • August 9, 2019
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    Some people want material thingsMe, I just want peace, happy times, and people who love me.

  • August 7, 2019
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    Mothers don’t fear death. Their greatest fear is leaving their children in this world knowing no one will love and care for them like her.

  • August 6, 2019
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    Let’s be clear, a lot of people don’t have “trust issues”. They have “I’ve seen this pattern of behavior before, and I’ll be damned if I go through the same crap again” issues.

  • August 4, 2019
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    What Anxiety Actually Is.  It’s More Than Just Worrying.

    Lots of people are under the misapprehension that anxiety is simply another term for worrying about something, and that people with anxiety are simply making a big deal out of nothing.

    The truth, however, is far more terrifying.

    Those of us who suffer from anxiety know just how debilitating it really is. We know how crippling it can be, how it can make whole days, weeks, months, and years of our lives slip past in a grey blur, our strongest memory being that sinking, gnawing feeling we get in our gut that leaves us unable to fully enjoy life or feel the full spectrum of emotion that other people do.

    Anxiety is that feeling that something is badly, deeply wrong, and that if we don’t sort it out something awful is going to happen – we just can’t work out what it is that’s so wrong in the first place. 

    Anxiety is feeling tired every waking moment of your life. It’s feeling exhausted by the tiniest obstacles, and totally worn down by the constant barrage of minor difficulties that life presents us with. 

    Anxiety is obsessing over the details of the past and fretting over the things that haven’t yet happened. It’s wondering if people hate you, or if you were weird the other night when you saw your friends. It’s sitting there quietly, unable to speak because you’re afraid of what others might think about you. 

    Anxiety is feeling pushed to tears overs unanswered texts or not being able to get a hold of the people you love.

    It’s apologizing for everything, even when you’ve done nothing wrong. It’s noticing every slight change in someone’s tone, and then obsessively thinking about whether or not a shift in their voice means that they secretly dislike you.

    It’s lying awake at night, staring at the ceiling, replaying the same thought loops over and over again in your head and feeling yourself falling deeper and deeper into that pit inside of you that makes you want to give up on life completely. 

    Anxiety is the process of slowly imploding in on yourself. It’s mental self-destruction that a sufferer simply can’t help but perform. This is the paradox at the heart of anxiety; someone who’s drowning can’t help but try to fight and thrash themselves up towards the surface. In the exact same way, someone with anxiety desperately worries and obsesses over something as they try to keep themselves afloat. In the end, though, all this does is make their situation worse and strengthens their anxious habits. The more anxious they feel, the worse their anxiety becomes, until every day is torture and it’s all they can do to get out of bed.

    Anxiety is the need for certainty, the need for control. It’s far, far more than nervousness or worrying; it’s a powerful, destructive medical condition, and it needs to be taken seriously. 

    It’s thinking too much. Caring too much. Fearing too much. It is loving too much.

    Anxiety is caring more than anything;  not wanting to hurt anyone’s feelings, not wanting to do anything wrong.  It’s wanting to be loved and accepted as who you are. Anxiety and all.

    Written by Maverick, Staff writer at Lessons Learned In Life Inc. ©
  • August 3, 2019
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    Love Will Find You When It’s Time.

     

    On some level, all of us just want to be loved. We want to be wanted. We want to be cherished and appreciated and understood. 
    The world can be a grizzly, depressing place. We all want that special someone to brighten it up, to protect us from the bad in our lives and hold our hand through hard times. We crave the love and affection that comes with being in a serious, committed relationship.
    Sometimes, however, this craving for love causes us to rush into relationships with the wrong people in a desperate attempt to fill the empty void we sense inside of us. In our attempts to find love, stability, and companionship, we get ourselves involved with people who just aren’t right for us because we think it’s better to risk unhappiness than to be alone.
    True love will come to you when the time is right. The real thing is worth waiting for.
    It’s frustrating, but love is an elusive creature. You can’t make it happen; it needs to happen by itself, organically. When you’re ready, it will come to you.
    You just have to wait.
    Wait for the person who loves you more than life itself. Wait for the person who will treasure you, who listens to you when you talk and holds you close when you’re upset. 
    Wait for the person who you’re best friends with. Wait for the person who understands you. Wait for the one who is honest and open with you, no matter how hard that might be.
    Life is too short to be unhappy. There just isn’t enough time to settle for a relationship that doesn’t fulfil you. You have to make the most of the time you’ve been given. 
    You have to be brave. You have to be okay with the idea of being on your own in order to give yourself the space you need to find true love. You have to be enough for yourself in order to avoid settling for someone you’re not right for just to avoid being alone. 
    So, wait. It’s the only thing you can do. 
    Wait for the one who makes you feel safe. Wait for the one who really cares about you. The one who supports you, encourages you, lifts you up, and makes you feel like you can do anything. 
    Wait for the one who truly loves you. The person who tells you how they really feel. The one who feels like home.
    Wait for the right person. You can’t hurry love, so be content in your own company for now; the right person for you is on their way. And when your souls finally meet, you’ll give each other the world.
    Written by Maverick, Staff writer at Lessons Learned In Life Inc. ©
  • August 2, 2019
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    I wanted to give you my heart forever. But all along, you were only using me.

     

    For the longest time, the only thing I wanted was for us to be together forever. I was completely spellbound by you. All I wanted was to be yours. In my mind, I was completely and utterly devoted to you. I would have done anything for you, anything for us; all you had to do was ask.
    I was yours, and you were mine – or so I thought. But somewhere along the way, something changed. 
    Slowly, I began to see a new side to you. I noticed that you’d treat me as an option while I always made you my main priority. You kept me at arm’s length, but I always wanted to be closer to you. 
    You lied to me by leaving out inconvenient details as well as by telling me things that weren’t true. You could never bring yourself to fully commit to me, when I’d chosen you over and over again. For me, it didn’t even seem like I had a choice to make. I picked you over everything else, because to me you were the only option.
    You used me. To you, I must have seemed like the perfect target. Innocent, hopeful, in love – and possibly a bit too naïve. 
    You took advantage of me. 
    I loved you. I thought the world of you. I wanted to give you my heart forever. But all along, you were only using me. You just strung me along, letting me think whatever was convenient for you at the time. 
    You played games with me. I was just something to pass the time for you. But you had my heart. It makes me sick to think about how foolish I was for so long; but I know that I can’t blame myself for someone else’s actions.
    You told me you loved me, but they were just empty words. You never did anything to show me that you actually cared. You were never there when it counted. You never stood by me when the chips were down. Actions speak louder than words, and yours were painfully quiet. 
    For the longest time I could see the writing on the wall, but I refused to accept it. I didn’t want to believe that I could have been so blind for so long. I didn’t want to admit that our ‘relationship’ had always been one-way.
    The truth is, you never deserved me. You weren’t worthy of being such a big part of my life. You weren’t worthy of my time, my love, or my tears. 
    You lost me because you never realized just how good you had it. You weren’t paying attention to the best thing you’ve ever had in your life. You were too busy being one of ‘the boys’, too busy using women and having a good time to even recognize you had someone who would have stood by you through anything. It never even occurred to you that you might one day regret treating me the way you did.
    I hope that one day you wake up and realize just what a huge mistake you made. I hope you feel sick and lie awake at night haunted by the knowledge that you could have had it all if you weren’t such a selfish, immature dick.
    You had something that most people would cherish forever, and you squandered it for a good time with random women. Even when I knew what was going on, I still stood by you. I was still willing to do what I had to do to make it work. But eventually, I opened my eyes and realized that you were no good for me. I realized that I was worth more than being treated the way you treated me. 
    I realized that I deserved to be happy. I realized that I deserved someone who actually loves me like I loved them.
    And that’s how you lost me – the best thing that ever happened to you. If someday you ever find yourself regretting the way you treated me, know that there’s no way in hell I will ever take you back. You had your chance, and you blew it. Breaking up with you was the best decision I’ve ever made; I’m never looking back.
    Written by Maverick, Staff writer at Lessons Learned In Life Inc. ©
  • August 1, 2019
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    For every single woman that cries in the shower so nobody else can see. 

    Author: Brittany Latham
    (Brittany Latham Studios)

    For the woman whose husband makes an “extra stop” after work every evening.
    For the woman who is mourning the loss of a pregnancy nobody knew about.
    For the woman who leads from the front even though she’s lost inside.
    For the woman who was fired for her fourth late because she’s been awake for a straight week with a sick child.
    For the single mum who doesn’t know how the utilities will stay on this month.
    For the woman who has gone through 2 IVF’s and tried for five years without success but still shows up to every baby shower for her friends.
    For the woman who still hasn’t forgiven herself for the abortion she had 20 years ago.
    For the woman who has a line of judging eyes at her and her children as she counts out coins and puts something back at the supermarket.
    For the woman that opens the door to the news of her husband being killed overseas three weeks before he was to return home.
    For the woman that lives with anxiety because nobody understands what she could possibly be stressed about.
    For the woman that gives to her family all day- everyday and just.needs.a.break.
    For the woman that smiles at strangers all day in public- but weeps silently every night.
    For the woman who has wanted to end it all but found strength to carry on.
    For the woman that heard the rumor about herself today.
    For the woman sleeping next to a stranger every night.
    For the woman whose genetics will never allow her to look like the ones in magazines.
    For the woman that endures one broken relationship after another because there was no father around to teach her what love looks like.
    For the woman raising a fatherless daughter and praying that history doesn’t repeat itself.
    For the woman who loves with all her heart who’s desperate to be loved.
    For every single woman that cries in the shower so nobody else can see. Because if you aren’t strong-nobody is.
    Just because the water washes your tears doesn’t mean you don’t cry. Just because you cry doesn’t mean you’re not strong enough to handle it.
    I am you. I see you. I am with you, I cry with you. I love you.

    Author: Brittany Latham
    (Brittany Latham Studios)

    You can visit her Facebook page here: https://www.facebook.com/brittanylathamphotography/